


After the Fall

by Rroselavy



Category: Saiyuki
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-09-03
Updated: 2010-09-03
Packaged: 2017-10-11 10:33:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,109
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/111482
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rroselavy/pseuds/Rroselavy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The changing seasons remind Goku of the impermanence of life.</p>
            </blockquote>





	After the Fall

The leaves fell in colorful drifts of golds, oranges, and reds, cascading over the worn footpath and silencing Goku's footfalls. The wind that brushed lightly against his skin was crisp with the hint of early snow.

There was a time not long ago when Goku dreaded the changing seasons. He hated the way the days shortened and the weather slowly turned unforgiving. Most of all he hated the silence that the snow brought with it. He hated that it blanketed every surface in monochrome white and smoothed out the trees and hills and turned the buildings and outcroppings into blobby shapes.

And fall was the beginning of that. Fall started the slide into winter, into the accompanying days of weak light and snow-muffled silence that had oppressed Goku in his prison.

Until the day Sanzo had found him and had broken the charms that had trapped him there.

Even years later, and years after they'd returned to monastery life at Chang'An, if Goku allowed himself to dwell on it, those old fears would rise again, running up and down his spine in involuntary shivers.

Now, although he was free of the curse that had imprisoned him, the changing of the seasons meant something entirely different: it brought on an entirely different fear, one that had him scouring Sanzo's face for any new creases or catching brief shots of silver in the golden strands of his hair. The changes, though, were still largely imperceptible. Sanzo's temper still ran hot as it ever did, and his body was still as well-muscled as it had been in his youth. And Goku knew Sanzo would just as soon as kill him as suffer his drippy thoughts.

So as leaves changed and the days grew shorter, Goku would often wander in the forest around the temple, as much to keep from getting on Sanzo's nerves as to let his thoughts wander freely until the worst of his fears subsided.

The snap of a twig alerted Goku to someone's arrival, and he turned his head to the sound, a smile blooming on his face when Sanzo stepped into the small clearing where he had stopped to rest. In the long rays of the late afternoon sun, Sanzo's hair was every bit as gold as the day Goku had first laid eyes on him, and Goku's heart beat just a little faster in his chest -- much as it had that day.

"Where the hell have you been?" Sanzo asked, the concerned expression on his face belying the irritation in his voice.

"Out walking." Goku rose from the log he'd been sitting on, and his footsteps stirred the leaves as he moved across the clearing to face Sanzo.

"You missed tea. It's not like you." Sanzo reached into the folds of his robe and produced his pack of cigarettes. He shook one out and then lit it; the flare of the match momentarily blinding Goku.

"I--I needed to think."

Sanzo huffed at Goku's explanation. "The day your thoughts become more important than your next meal is the day I die."

Goku tried to manage a smile. Sanzo looked at him quizzically, took a few drags of his cigarette, then put it out carefully before secreting the spent end into a hidden pocket.

"You shouldn't live in the future. You'll miss everything you have right now."

Goku had expected Sanzo to chew him out. The instant Buddhist tenet came as a surprise. He dropped his gaze, feeling chastised just the same. Sanzo stepped closer, his shadow enveloping Goku. Gently, he lifted Goku's chin with his thumb and forefinger. The acrid smell of his cigarette clung to Sanzo's hair and his robes; underneath the sharp odor was one more subtle: Sanzo himself. The familiarity of the scent comforted Goku.

"Besides, it's foolish to worry about something you can't possibly stop." The seriousness of Sanzo's expression startled Goku. He slid his eyes away from Sanzo's, suddenly self-conscious.

"But, San--" His defense was cut short when Sanzo's warm lips pressed down on his. He hadn't realized he was cold, but now with the heat of Sanzo's body warming the air between them, Goku drew toward it, melting against Sanzo's larger frame. Sanzo's hands brushed Goku's cheeks and then tangled in his hair, anchoring him as the kiss deepened and intensified. When they finally broke apart, Goku was panting, and he felt a trickle of sweat slide down the center of his chest.

He was hard and hungry for more than just a kiss. And Sanzo was grinning, inasmuch as Sanzo smiled.

"See what else you missed, when you decided to skip your supper?"

Goku could only nod, still a little dazed from the kiss. After a few seconds, though, he felt the uneasiness creeping back in, clouding the moment.

Sanzo made a clicking noise with his tongue. "You're going to be fine."

Goku blinked. Of course he worried what would happen to him when Sanzo died, but that worry paled in comparison to the loneliness, to how much he would miss Sanzo.

"That's not it, Sanzo--" But before he could finish his statement, Sanzo had pulled him into another kiss.

This time Sanzo was more insistent. His hands slid down Goku's sides and cupped Goku's ass, pulling their groins together. Goku moaned softly, and his fingernails scraped against Sanzo's bamboo breastplate as they vainly sought out the warmth of his skin. The folds of Sanzo's sutras ruffled in the breeze.

Sanzo's assault on Goku's senses was relentless. His hips ground against Goku's, ensuring the bulges made by their erections rubbed together incessantly. At the same time, he kissed Goku voraciously, his tongue boldly plumbing the depths of Goku's mouth.

This time when Sanzo pulled away, Goku nearly lost his balance. He was prevented from falling by Sanzo's firm grip on his wrists. Before their eyes met, Goku was heartened to see that Sanzo looked as disheveled as he felt. Sanzo took Goku's hand and pressed it against his chest underneath the armor.

"I'm here now, moron," he said, his voice low. And his powerful heartbeat affirmed that -- underneath Goku's palm and the rough fabric of Sanzo's robes. "So quit wasting our time." He stepped away from Goku and turned toward the path. A breeze shook the leaves from the tree branches above their heads and they spun lazily on eddies of invisible air currents.

Sanzo paused and then held out his hand for him. Goku took it without hesitation and then entwined their fingers. He squeezed Sanzo's hand. "I'm sorry, Sanzo. You're right."

"Of course I am," Sanzo replied, pulling Goku toward the path that led back to the temple.


End file.
